The Digital Shutterbug (aryx) wrote,
The Digital Shutterbug

This journal has been placed in memorial status. New entries cannot be posted to it.


From: Bin Laden, Osama

Subject: The Cave

Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours but we've really come
together as a group and I love that. Big thanks to Omar for putting up the
poster that says "There is no I in team" as well as the Garfield that says
"Hang In There, Baby." Very hilarious.

However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the
cave. And frankly I have a few concerns.

First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we
should be even more concerned about the carpet dust in our cave. We want to
avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to
sweep the cave daily, I've done my bit on the cleaning rotation ........
have you? I've posted a sign up sheet near the cave reception area (next to
the toaster).

Second, it's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to
scare most of the world population, okay? That means that while we're
taping, please do not ride your razor scooter in the background or keep
doing the 'Wassup' thing. Just while we're taping. Thanks.

Third: Food. I bought a box of Dairylea recently, clearly wrote "Ossy" on
the front, and put it on the top shelf. Today, two of my Dairylea slices
were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying.

Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soldiers in disguise trying
to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First
patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar, and Dave.

Love you lots, Group Hug. Os.

PS - I'm sick of having Osama's Bed Linen scribbled on my bed sheets -Cut it
out Abdul, not funny anymore.

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